Book Review – It is murder. Has $66 million been purloined?
Maureen Korp
It is murder, one, two—or maybe, just maybe, none at all. Has $66 million been purloined? Well, read on. See what the characters in University of Lost Causes by Larry J. McCloskey have to say. Who are they? We read the story from the point-of-view of Phelim O’Neill, director of the university’s Centre for Students with Disabilities, aka, “island of the misfits,” as he himself terms the place.
Phelim O’Neill is good with coinage. His days include meetings called by SAP, one of his antagonists. She is “Special Advisor” to the university’s president. SAP tells him 80% of his staff must now conform to equity guidelines. What about the contract workers? “They have no rights,” SAP replies. She’d erase him if she could. She cannot. Phelim is a highly visible university administrator. He is a 250-lb quadriplegic, trundling about in his wheelchair.
Phelim heads off to Paddy’s Pub. John Staffal awaits their weekly take-down of the worlds around them. Staffal is fond of quoting Voltaire: “Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.” Staffal teaches Shakespeare. Woke sorts will replace that with “Literature of Oppression.” Staffal sometimes parades about dressed as Cyrano de Bergerac.
Where are we? Somewhere south of the border, at St. Jude University. SJU is named for the patron saint of lost causes. By chapter eight we read Putin has been assassinated, and Russia lost the Ukraine War. By chapter 13, we are told of Dr. Jordan Peterson’s latest diatribe: 50,000 words entitled, “In Defense of the Megalomaniac who Damaged Civility and saved Civilization.” Its subject? criminally convicted Donald Trump, now handed a 145-year prison sentence.
The plot is thickening. Staffal has invited Jordan Peterson to SJU to debate important matters. In chapter 17, we learn the subject will be “Critical Race Theory,” unless it is “Abortion vs Adoption.” The debate will take place just before Christmas in the university’s Great Hall of Diversity, Inclusion, Equity. Yes. The DIE Hall.
The publisher assures the reader: “This is a work of fiction and any resemblances to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events or locales is entirely coincidental.” Coincidences, however, are actual events. Larry J. McCloskey, the author, was the founder of Carleton University’s esteemed Paul Menton Centre for Students with Disabilities. He directed the centre for more than 30 years before taking retirement to become a psychotherapist.
In between the novel’s satirical layers, one story is told in straightforward historical narration. It is the storyline of a work Phelim intends to write one day. Weekly, John Staffal discusses its framework with Phelim. The story is that of Fred and Roma, two brave souls bent on killing Adolf Hitler in his mountain retreat over Christmas holidays high in the Alps of Berchtesgaden, Bavaria. Fred is American. Roma is a Jew from Poland. Is she really? (This reader notes Roma is the correct name of those labelled “gypsy.” That term is a slur. Possibly half of Europe’s Roma were killed in the extermination camps.)
University of Lost Causes is a book to underline, and read more than once, not only for historical references. Maybe one day, it lands on a “cancel culture” reading list at Woke-up University? Along with index and bibliography?
University of Lost Causes, by Larry J. McCloskey Burlington: Castle Quay Books, 2024. 356 pp
